We didn’t get that 2-3 weeks’ notice we were hoping for instead we got a week. My husband got home on a Wednesday, we had that whole week after, and that following Monday it was time to go. It sounds like a lot of time but when you start broke, end broke, and have to figure out how you’re going to rent a car it makes things that much more difficult. We didn’t have a house of our own to begin with. We stayed with his parents while he was home and when he left, I stayed with my parents. We had stuff at both homes, so it wasn’t a simple pack and move situation. He got home November 21, we couldn’t get a car until November 29 and we were leaving December 3 – I know a complete waste of money, but we had to get our stuff.
Our parents don’t live near one another, so it wasn’t a 10 or even 20-minute drive and add some traffic to that too. I thought it would be easier with a car, but I wish we hadn’t even got it. As selfish as this’ll sound, I didn’t want having a car to turn into “Come see us before y’all leave”, but that’s exactly what happened. To be more specific it was, “When y’all bringing the girls over?” which is what really had me feeling some type of way. I remember someone telling me “once you have kids, you no longer matter” and I’m cool with that. What I’m not cool with is people being more concerned about seeing our kids rather than giving a fuck that we were in the process of moving and wanting us to go out of our way. Nobody came to us, not one person. It’s only three people I understood and that’s our grandparents but everyone else there’s no excuse. I wasn’t expecting to see everyone before we left however there were a few I didn’t get to see that I wish I had. I was so upset – and still am – that no one asked if we needed help with anything. Seriously, the concern was the kids and the kids only.
I get it, we’re moving so no one will see them on a regular even though no one was to begin with – except my parents and that’s because we lived there. But you can’t squeeze months of missed time into four days. Regardless of how anyone feels there was ample opportunity for people to see our kids, but they chose not to. Many hate to hear that because it involves them not getting their way, but it’s the truth. I didn’t want to spend too much time visiting people because I knew it would take a toll on me and that it did. What made it worse was out of those we did see not everyone was grateful. I felt bad at first, but everyone knew we were leaving so I can’t carry that guilt on my shoulders. So much was going on from the 29th till the 2nd I just wanted to leave.
The night before it was time to go I didn’t get any sleep…. by choice. I was so excited and busy thinking about how much happier I’ll be once we move. I paid for it later though. We got up at 4:30AM to finish anything we didn’t the day before, so we could make our flight. We got to the airport at a decent time and still damn near missed our flight. Between the check in lady and TSA I was ready to turn around and go back to my parent’s house. The check in lady was rude as hell. Oh, she had me on edge to the point that my husband had to pull me to the side to say, “Relax! Don’t say nothing”. Then, TSA had me damn near strip to go through a machine and get a pat down all because everything except my state ID has my new last name on it. Even though the pat down pissed me off what had me really upset was them swabbing my clothes, wallet, baby milk, and her damn bottles which wasn’t “a faster process” like they said it be. They did all that and it still didn’t fix the fact that the name isn’t changed. I just wanted my property back because my main concern was getting on that plane.
I was already irritated then I stepped foot on the plane and became nervous. Of course, being nervous came from all the movies and stories on the news about plane crashes and getting stuck in water, etc. I was so tired, and my children had gone to sleep already. I just wanted to go, so I could go too because I was that nervous. I thought I was good after take off, I knew it was going to be a smooth flight, then…. I started farting. OH MY GOSH! I was farting both flights, the whole way, and I was praying no one smelled anything. And they were the worst ones, yes, the silent killers. I guess nobody smelled them or they chose not to say anything, so I was grateful for that. Our kids did well until the last few minutes of the last flight. The baby started crying and I could tell she was scared when the plane turned. While the oldest had an accident, which caused a wardrobe change. I was growing impatient being on that plane plus we hit turbulence, so I was kind of freaking out. So as soon as I heard, “We’re preparing to land” that excitement was coming back. Once we got our luggage the first question I asked was, “Can we go to the hotel?”.
We got to the hotel and I just knew I’d like it. Nope! That isn’t the case at all and we’re carless. We’re house hunting which is more difficult than I thought and with our kids running, crawling and crying all hours of the day it bothers me more because I thought we’d be in our own space. We’ve been making things work though no matter how uncomfortable this process is. The one thing I can say is this lifestyle IS NOT FOR THE WEAK, AT ALL. I’ve even had my first rude encounter which consisted of me speaking to a woman and her husband who didn’t speak back until he was walking to get his child – I could tell he was a higher rank. Then, as my child started to play, they took their kids and left. Now, some would say that they were probably already leaving but no. There are three playgrounds in that area and the one we were at was the biggest and they got there the same time we did. Either way it’s cool because I don’t forget much plus my kids have each other and they’ll meet others as they grow older. Hell, even the people in the hotel we’re staying in barely speak. I’m just cautious because I know this isn’t where I’m from and I don’t want my personal feelings to affect my husband in any way.
After all we’ve been through to get here on top of what we’re currently going through, I’m glad I came nonetheless. What was supposed to be 6 to 8 months turned into a year and eight days. But Monday, December 3, 2018 we started our next chapter as one – just my husband, the kids, and I. We don’t know a soul here, but I’ve connected with a few decent souls – four people. I’m hoping to accomplish a few things while here, create some genuine friendships, and overall enjoy this place. A lot of people don’t get opportunities like this and being as though I have it, I don’t want to take it for granted. I’m the first in my family to move out of the DMV area and I’ve seen/heard so many say how happy they are for me. This is my clean slate, my new start and I want to do everything I’ve been wanting to.